Sandcastle Disco

...You don't know that song??? Thats unfortunate. lol



So today I've come to the realization that Solange knowles is the TRUTH!! If you don't agree with me then give her mus[e]ic especially the new sound a real good listen. Stop hating, that girl got talent. I'm not gonna lie I was sleeping on her too but thats a done deal.



Anywhoo, I'm back with a whole backpack of stories and feelings. Kind of feeling 'him'...there's always a 'him' so stop trying to keep up. lmao



But yea I have a lil crush steadily growing but thats all. Still stunningly single and loving it! Its actually doing wonders for my karma seeing as how I could've done a whole lot of trouble these last few days.



I didn't!! Stop judging me but I thought about it. Hmmm...
Time for breakfast and another long day with the homies but its just another interesting day in my life.

*Turns up 'Halo' by beyonce, puts it on repeat and zones...*

Peace Earthlings,
BlueBelle

Listening to my horoscope...(poem!)

Ironically my end of the year horoscope (I'm a virgo by the way) said that I need to start utilizing poetry, so funny since I am a poet. Basically poetry is a great way to express myself and its cost efficient so I should include more into my life and carry it through to the new year. I talked to one of my very best friends today Jameer and was catching up on life but when I brought up the poem I wrote for him in August he didn't even remember. Which I won't lie hurt my feelings a lil so now I am going to post the piece because it was dope!

And because I love him even if he doesn't see it everyday he should feel it...

*Enjoy*

30-30 day 11, poem 10: a reason, a season and a lifetime…

Fall weather in fort greene
Brings me southern comfort
Collard green colored autumn leaves
home cooked smiles
Delicious December
Blankets thoughts in perfection
Pure snow topped landscapes
Silent horizons peak at me
From under sheets of slumber
Bracing against cold weather
With warm sensations
Layered in blessings
Neo soul tracks sound
Of sight at first impressions
Beautiful stranger
Purple rainfalls of tears
Cover old poems written
Before yours
Mahogany majesty
The real thing in stereo
Draws goose bumps every February
Simple satire draped in irony
Blinded in past tense
Careless with your affection
Sing to me off-key stories of forever
In notes manifested only for my ears
Whispers of your name ignite old flames
Of beach bonfires with friends
Togetherness
Childhood games like“Mother, may I?”
Kiss your sun
His light is unmistakable
Summer heat makes me miss him
Falling in love with me
Once beneath trees with hundreds of years
In rings around their trunks
Filled with history
Like ours
I can’t stop loving you
No matter what song I hear
Play in the past
Never thought kem was a prophet
Until we met in the future
I can wait for happiness
If It looks like you
Awaken in cold sweats
Nightmares about nevers
Chances only happen in blue moons
Angels who wear brown skin
Not cliché wings but just
Fly
Fall weather in fort greene
Makes me remember absent hugs
Arms that shield globes
The universe versus us
Little people make big impacts
Breezes bend around bare branches
Hold me
So I’ll never forget
The face of everything
That meant something to me
If I didn’t know you,
Then where would I Be?




Did you like it? Its unedited and freewritten but its soooo...hmm...real? vulnerable? honest?
All that, all that. lmao

Peace Earthlings,
Blue

Christmas ReMiX: Diddy edition

Anyone who personally knows me also knows that I celebrate the first day of kwanzaa (Dec 26th) as Christmas remix. Uh huh I said remix. Its a day that my close friends and I have to enjoy what a REAL christmas should be without the 30 second commercials.

-Family
-togetherness
-LOVE
-giving (not always receiving)
and quality time to be grateful for all of your friends

The day in a blur was lights, camera (my new pink digital camera to be exact) and Action...Ya Digg?? hehehehe I love Lil Wayne quotes. We were missing a Ty! but still made due. With all the shopping, eating and poetry we still missed her but it didnt damper the day.

Well today wasn't the 26th but we did all get together and discuss the crazy events of the remix, had dinner and walked in the misty fog. By the way what in the world was that about??!! lmao

There are pics and stories but its more like "you had to have been there'' so no details. Just missed blogging.

Peace Earthlings,
Blue

Santa Baby forgot to mention one lil thing...

Merry Christmas Everyone!

...and if you don't celebrate christmas Happy Holidays!!

The sun has not risen but I am up (as usually) counting my blessings. The holidays are about being grateful and enjoying your loved ones.

I am trying to appreciate the silver lining in the gray cloud that 2008 has been over my life. This year wasn't that bad but I'm fiending for 2009.

Quote frm turkey day that shall be used for all holidays thus forth:
(Adult) "You kids want sparkling cider?"

"Is that sparkling juice?? We're about to get drunk. Pop champagne!!" -by chanelle's nephew dakim

Hahahaha. Enjoy ppl!

Peace (on earth) Earthlings,
BlueBelle

Male nurse, anyone?? lol

After the dominican rum, coronas, smokey bathrooms lip syncing beyonce in harlem with Mr. 'Lightfeet' (lmao) himself and Number 23....at 7 in the morning I was still awake.

Back in bklyn though, warm and not sleepy. So I talked to my mom about reincarnation, healing spirits and angels. That is until I turned on Maury *Its a Man/Woman* and fell asleep.

When I woke up, I felt HORRIBLE. My voice is not normal yet which sucks being a poet and I can't breathe. Not to mention the fact that I can really use a massage.

After sleep, chicken soup, and pumpkin pie I felt extremely better. The laughs from my best friends and the love from my P.O.T's (POTential 'lovers') really helped but I'm still searching for a male nurse!

Any takers? *wink*

Peace Earthlings,
BlueBelle

Black Ice Love Tales

I gave my best friend some advice on blasts from the past today. I told her to be cautious when walking on black ice because you don't know when you might fall.

For some reason past loves can sense when you need them. They contact you after months or years of absence to rekindle bonds. But do you think bridges that have been burned can ever be rebuilt?

I talked to him today. Rooted firmly in Bangladesh and Jamaica. Feelings of 6th grade butterflies again like the day we met in bushwick. Why stop the 4yr silence to tell me secrets? I could've loved him at 11yrs old but now I'm not so sure.

He called last night. My nigerian shadow who would cloud me with doubt. We were just friends but maybe I took his expectations too far. Never to be more. We stopped speaking all of 2008, like we've never met. Like his mother didn't love me, like we never spoke for hours and shared our dreams. I'm sorry I loved you as a friend and that you loved me as your wife. What do you have to say before the new year? Your cold distance said it all.

Everytime I hear 'Come back to me' I think of my first love. How things could've been different if they were different. It was real but was it meant forever? We'll never know.

As for 'future' (which is what I'll name my new crush) when you're ready, I'll be here.

I think I'll need shoes with better grip to tread carefully over this 'black ice'.

Peace Earthlings,
BlueBelle

Aaron Mcgrudger= Genius

I just finished watching 2 reruns of The Boondocks on Adult Swim. For the sleepwalkers who have never seen that show...where have you been? And for the haters, respect Aaron's gangster! For real.

I may have watched these episodes many times before but its still educational, hilarious and eye opening. First one was about graffitti which for everyone who knows me understands how I feel about it.

Tagging is ART, too!! Yea I said it let the judgement begin.

Next one was on racial profiling and lemonade stands. Come on!! Who thinks like that?? Pure genius.

In it Jazmine (the lil mixed girl who lives on their block) starts a lemonade stand in the middle of a heatwave, the day of a shooting, which is taken over by a white businessman in order for her to buy a pony. Which she never gets, obviously.

She names the pony she's never seen except for once through a picture, Sammy Davis Jr the pony!!! Can you see the historical context in just that??? What?!

If not get up on your black history and find out a little more about Sammy Davis Jr who was a legend by the way.

All of this left me at the end of each half hour episode soaked in commercials with my jaw dropped and lots of things on my mind.

Someone please tell me what the hell Aaron Mcgrudger's I.Q is because he is a certified genius in my book. Logos! <---(my new 'word' look it up) lol

You think he's single?? Cuz I'm looking...

Peace Earthlings,
BlueBelle

A moment for the WB frog.

*sings* Hello my baby, hello my darling...

Yea I know that's random but I was thinking about Writers Block's show tonight and that came to mind. *shrugs* Maybe he can be our new mascot. Lol.

The show tonight @ the bowery was B-A-NA-NA-S!!

"I am the truth, so why would I lie" {Rip the MC/host & mastermind behind writers block}

People who haven't been seen in forever were out at the show. We even got the atmosphere open early but we must not forget the poetry.

But WAIT Theophilus London was there to start us off!! Talk about dope. His music, stage presence and overall personality was dope. If you don't know him please google him and get some his music. You will NOT be dissappointed.

Okay so then the poetry happened. We have an amazing collective who tore it up tonight [Rip, Kesed, Falu, Soulful Jones and Aja-Monet]. Maad new poems. Tears were shed. It got Real at the bowery.

Then there was the "after the show its the Afterparty!" which I won't speak to much on it. Hot FIYAH!!! But you should've been there...

Special shouts to Urbanword nyc, Get old money, A.l.i.e.n, Bitten tongue, philly youth slam team, and everyone else who was in the heavy. There is no us without YOU. Dead ass...

Maad excitement, a glass of wine, watery eyes, overworked sweat glands and a train ride later I am STILL awake. Wtf.

Like I don't have another job and another show to go to tomorrow. I'm ghost!

Peace Earthlings,
BlueBelle

Mic Check!! 1,2,1,2

Sorry had to check to see if this thing was on...lmao.

No work today. Didn't have to go in neither did I have my business meeting with my other boss Rip (jaime). It was nice to kick back today but its making me restless. An idle brain is very dangerous ppl.

Tomorrow is Writers Block presents The poetry party @ the bowery poetry club in the L.E.S. Apparently everyone is coming. I'm excited!! I love what I do. Couldn't imagine life without poetry.

Why else what I get that tattoo??

Talked to the twin flame today, Ty. I enjoy her incredible stories of everyday life. So much laughter. Come home soon lady!!!

As for the [non-existent] love life...*shrugs* Guys are playing the opposition to my feelings. Well actually I've been thinking of a certain somebody lately.

I wonder if he can feel me right now feeling him. Did that make sense?? Whatever, you know what I mean. Lol

Okay, back to zoning to my new fav soundtrack. Ya tu sabes! See you later on @ the bowery around 10pm? Kool beans...

Peace Earthlings,
BlueBelle

Dear Elmont (L.I) *poem*

It snowed the day I met your mother
Walked frosty paths to your heart
The snowflakes poured on our parade
Showering the day with perfection
Smelling of stale haze
We stopped dreaming
Sober
Tasting the inconsistency
Into holding on
That we exhale yesterday
Together
Winter makes it possible
To see breath committ suicide
Hang itself
On every word spoken
Like a true poet
Maybe if I were to kiss
Your blunt laced lips
I would get high;
Do lines
Of love.
Open like noses that tunnel vision
Freedom
Hearts that are open
From being smoked out
Of their hiding place
Vulnerable
Layered in fresh fallen flaws
Before your mother
Humbled by her judgement
And my insecurities
I introduce myself
As 'August' in december
Out of season global warming
Hoping to melt her baby boy's
Glacial exterior
Longing to be closer
Then words that make sense
In another dialect
To understand each other
I want to know him
Prose,
Personally,
Objectively in spreadsheets
That are microsoft,
Word
Has been our bond
Since logos
The dawn of time
Capsule,
Eclipse like his shade.
We met years ago
I remember our connection
From the womb,
Don't forget to kiss me
Before you leave
Again.

{Disclaimer} this was my day in a freewrite after spending time in L.I with a friend I thought could be more. I thought wrong. *shrugs*

No more poems that aren't earned. Tired of writing fantasies. Though there is a man that has been tresspassing on my thoughts lately. Hmm...time will tell. Lets just live, me and you, cool?

Peace Earthlings,
BlueBelle

Lack of sleep & bubble baths @ 6am

I can't sleep. At least I won't tonight. Partially because it was a hectic day, and on the other hand I have to get up early today to go to L.I.

Now after looking back, I realize these are mundane responses. Actually I'm up vibing off the Pink lavalamp (yes macario dropped it off earlier. Thanks! Lol). Its really dope. I can't turn it off, so I put it on my ipod on repeat. *shrugs*

This is making me nostalgic. Listening to the trials of charles' life from years ago makes me wonder what changed in my life. I also had suicide attempts, issues, family drama but how did I get through that??

Maybe the same way he did by isolating myself in my dream (writing). I'm scared to revisit the old poems/journals of those days I try so hard to forget. Its like picking at scabs or is it just like grazing your hand over an old scar remembering how you got it???

Whatever. It still makes me nervous.

I am starving now!! But its almost time for breakfast. I'm contemplating whether or not to take a bubble bath now. Continue zoning to the P. L. Lamp. Hmmm...maybe.

Peace Earthlings,
Blue

Mobile Blogging

So F*%& the dance theatre workshop!! Who had basically 50% of the audience outside of the show including the family members of the performers!!! Homie by the door was about to get smacked. (Shoutout to B. Yung and Ariel) lol. You guys were great company for that hour. Lovely side door behind the soundless tv helped me catch at least the second half (jasmine and carvens).

*sigh*

Now that I've finished venting let me just say that I am proud of Jasmine and Carvens. You guys did a wonderful job. I was totally feeling your pieces especially carvens....

"Its hard to be a teenager but its harder to be a teenager with a dream especially when your parents climb into your sleep and tell you its not gonna happen" -carvens lissaint

Damn Carv. Now its just me, reynold and ayanna in the pizza shop on 7th avenue with no pizza in front of us. We're sitting talking about our flaws and futures. Amazing how imperfections make you closer to someone else.

Hmmm...I'm growing.

Peace Earthlings,
BlueBelle

Platonic Conversations @ 6am

I can see the horizon beyond the buildings in the subtle colors of pale pinks, blues and orange hues. Staring at my bestie who's lying across one of the twin beds in this dorm. We haven't slept in 24 hours but I am not tired of late night adventures yet. Listening to random songs on his itunes. I think i've found a new friend in G. He's a cool dude once you get to know him.

Maybe the bestie will pursue him or leave him with the other men she discards. Doesn't matter as a young woman in the city you can always use another older 'brother'. So maybe I'll adopt him. I love venturing to places I've never been and making strangers my new friends. You may think I'm weird but whatever. Thats why you're lonely. Ha!

Had fun at the stepshow, it was cool but the aftermath was better. Train rides, diner, dorms, attempts at parties and random humans who looked like Powder! (Remember that movie??)

I'm still wondering about what to eat for breakfast...or whether to go to the UW christmas party. I need that pink lavalamp Macario!! lmao. Blowing up his spot and whatnot.

Peace Earthlings,
BlueBelle

There ain't nothing like a brooklyn girl...

I'm so proud of my homie Charles Hamilton who just released his first video 'Brooklyn Girls'. It's so doooopppeee!! As a born and bred brooklynite when I first heard the song I was hype. Finally we were getting recognition as being some flyy women from someone other than Jay-Z (shoutout to Hova). So on behalf of every sexy, single, intelligent bklyn female...

Thank you, Charles!!!!
http://charleshamilton.blogspot.com

After reading blogs for a while now, I am very happy to finally have my own. Yes its still under construction until I holla at my girl Riv. (Yo, Riv. whats good??) lol. Expect many updates people and stuff...whatever...

I'm about to get moving. Have lots to do tonight trying to get that 'Pink Lavalamp' (Come on with it Macario). I loovvvee Harlem!! (insider)

Peace,
BlueBelle